Top 10 LEAST Essential Things pt.1

So now we are going to have some super duper snob-type fun and post our LEAST essential items ever, for all time to us. We really don't need these things, and for the most part, would rather other people not need them, also. they are for LOSERS, you see. You will not have a job, or a life, and go to hell, if you are a part of or have anything to do with these demon articles.

allison's least essential:

bluetooth headset

ed hardy

walmart

queen bee accessories

Kieran's 10 Essentials

allison: do you have anything to say about this collection of items, Kieran?

kieran: it's subject to debate. I'm busy looking at dudesnudes, leave me alone.

what we talk about when we talk about love,

by raymond carver

kiehl's

Allison's 10 Essentials

jeggings

husqvarna sewing machine

maker's mark whiskey

Ten Essentials

My friend directed me to a feature on GQ called "10 Essentials". It's basically just a bunch of taste-maker stylish-type-men letting you know what they are like, into, man. LOTS of men. Like, John Varvatos, Rag and Bone, the creative director of APC, Kanye West (blech), Mark Ronson. I can't really talk...on a daily basis I have a screaming fit over something I see somewhere that makes me crazed with desire. And then all day I'm like, "LET ME TELL YOU about THIS THING" until people want to choke me because they are like, "listen, I already know about this because you facebook'd it like an hour ago, plus the homeless man on the street just told me to tell you to shut up about it". Anywhoozles, so Kieran and I are going to make our top ten essentials, for fun, and to try to make ourselves feel really fun and special, and then post them.

Rodarte for Target: Will you care?

I have NOT cared lately about any of the Target collaborations. They have consistently disappointed me to the point where I have stopped paying attention to new ones. I think the last one I liked a piece out of was Erin Fetherston (ugh) because the designs were cute, and proportional. What always seems to be the problem for me is that it seems like the designer wants to do something a little too edgy and ends up with a big fat FAIL. For this one, I like certain parts of it and am grossed out by others.

This is not the best. I feel like leopard print is okay, but maybe not as a dress, and maybe not my most favorite animal print right now. I don't think this will sell. There is also a sequined gray leopard print dress.

I kind of like the idea of this denim jacket, but don't think it would look good on. I do like these tulle skirts but...do you see the weird things on her arms? That is a "tulle bow shirt". WHAT? I would rather not wear this option. I love sheer things, especially if they are lycra...but that is strange.

I think this look is more successful, but I still don't like the heinous gray leopard print bow. The dress is pretty though, and I like these lace cardigans.

Again, hate the belt. I'm liking the sweater, and these knee-highs. They are called "cut out knee highs". Whatever. I like the tan and peach combination, and they are only ten bucks. Also, can we talk about these sunglasses? I'm not really sure what they are going for here...they just remind me of the remake of Willy Wonka. I guess they are goth/Tim Burton/mod or something? I'm not sure who was in charge of this photo shoot but when you want to make your clothing look young and punk or whatever you should probably not hire a model who looks forty and try to fix it by putting a streak of red in her hair.

Work Wear Done Right

Women's wool jacket

Filson is the most underrated of all the outdoor/workwear companies out there. Maybe it's the Seattle spirit of underdog, but while Pendleton does all the high-falutin' designer collab stuff and gets all the spotlight, Filson is quiet, and wonderful. The Field House has been the first place I've noticed with at least a few Filson items, like the bags and wool socks. This company is basic and durable, it's for those of us who cannot wear a wool plaid shirt ANY MORE (thanks college kids who listen to Vampire Weekend!) I think this should be their new slogan. "When the sight of red plaid makes you want to vomit, wear Filson." Their factory is in Sodo, check em' out!

Filson Online Store

Seattle Winter Uniform

There is nothing really WRONG with the fact that every woman in Seattle is wearing this outfit right now as we speak. I mean, yes, it's been storming and there aren't many options when there are huge puddles everywhere and you don't really want to go out in anything, much less try to be all FASHION and such. But it has really gotten to a point where every 1/3 girls who walks by my apartment in Capitol Hill is wearing a very close variety of this outfit. Maybe the coat is actually Tulle rather than GAP, or the boots are Frye's, or the hat is...cream colored. I can't believe people are still wearing these hats. All I'm saying is let's try to be more creative during these harsh winter times, people.

5 Things You Don't Know About Juggalos

1. What They Even Are

The term "Juggalo" was created by the band Insane Clown Posse during a show in which they were rap/singing about a “Juggla”. He called the audience a bunch of “jugglas” or “juggalos”, as they are now known. So they are basically a gang, made of fans of a band, who enjoyed being compared to circus clowns of some sort. They also somehow follow the band’s set of albums called….this fact alone makes the by far the creepiest kind of fans there are. Even more than death metal, or WoW geeks, or people who actually like acid jazz. You kind of have to see them to understand, but they are all about “family”, so they are usually in large groupings. They wear lots of gross nineties looking goth-wear (not the cool kind) like JNCOs, baggie bondage pants and XL t-shirts you would buy at Spencer’s Gifts. Actually, a lot of what they wear could probably be bought at Spencer’s Gifts. They are usually on, trying to get, or selling a lot of drugs and alcohol. A good amount of young Juggalos are homeless or trailer trash. They are usually also fans of the bands Twizted, Tech N9ne and lots of other gross nu-metal acts.

2. Juggalos Are Hella Aggro

Seriously this is just breeeeezed over most of the time. There are a few articles online that address this problem, but on the Wikipedia entry (obviously a biased one) it defends the lifestyle, saying that it has nothing to do with the violent acts surrounding the subculture. This is total bullshit, juggalos are extremely violent and dangerous, and even early on in the article it says the music is a form of catharsis to release “violent aggression”. They are obsessed with the fact that they are “family”, and they have to protect the band and their Juggalo family members. There’s a lot of discussion about “haters”. However, I think the music has less to do with this than the fact that they are usually poor, uneducated, drug addicted trailer trash.

3. Juggalos Do Not Like Gays and Womens Very Much.

In the Juggalo world, women are sort of like second-class citizens. They are called “Juggalettes”, and a lot of them get assaulted at shows and festivals. Sometimes if a woman is deemed too slutty or whatnot, they are called “Juggahoes”, which is EVEN WORSE. Sometimes Juggalos make fun of Juggalettes, because they are often overweight, ugly, and loud-mouthed. Apparently they have never heard of the pot calling the kettle black, hmm? Now, this would definitely get disputed if I ever got into an argument with a Juggalo, because apparently Juggalettes are “down-ass bitches”. I think that’s my point.

Also they hate gays, I know this because they say ‘”faggot” like every other word. FACT.

An Excerpt:

"Lol...you know i see the resemblence in juggalonews.com and insane/intimate clown posses carrier: They used to be great, on there game, and try hard. Now there all lazy and like to suck cock all day and have gay shit all over there shit its really fucking disgusting and WOW its bad. O well, icp and juggalonews.com will always suck dick they will not get better so mine as well get used to them."

Recently it’s come to light that ICP might actually be promoting a Christian message, and that it had been hidden behind violence during the early songs but now is becoming more prominent (kind of like how Munkey from Korn became born-again). This is kind of up in the air, they say they are "spiritual", like your uncle in AA, but the lyrics are totally insane and all over the place. There is a separate class of Juggalos, however, that really, truly don’t give a fuck if you are gay or an alien, as long as you are DOWN WITH THE CLOWN.

4. Juggalos Have A Special Diet.

Besides meth and huffing, Juggalos like to eat very specific things. Number one, of course, is the flavored soda Faygo. I think it has something to do with being from Detroit, and it also ends in the Juggalo’s favorite letter, O! Sometimes on websites they capitalize all of the Os! It’s super fun. Anyways I’ve heard they also like to eat only food that ends in O, like Cheetos, Spaghetti-Os, Burritos, Jell-O etc., etc. This isn’t verified, but I could believe it. Notice how it’s like the worst diet, ever.

5. Juggalos HATE Spelling and Grammer.

Have you ever visited http://www.juggalonews.com/? Or, go to youtube and find an ICP or twisted video and look at the comments. Just looking at these comments makes me want to send them to a Sylvan Learning Center ASAP.

Excerpts:

“its always col when you learn mre and more about ICP, remember, raise the hatchet do or die!! they are so true about just gettin there music across, they dont care if you buy there merch or not, they just want everyone to hear there message!!!!! ICP4L TRUE JUGGALO!!! "

“OK ive been reading a lot of des articles, n all ive been seeing is dis faggot ass bitch ahhadersadickinmymouth or ahha34 w/e his name is diss on the juggalos n ICp n everything they do, n hes saying hes been down for 15 yrs, if u r down wit da clowns 4 dat long DEN Y DA FUCK R U TALKING SHIT,n also dis is suppose to be a juggalo family, n all i hear is u saying to juggalos "hottopic ass juggalos" u shouldn't even b in dis family if u hate on everyone if u dont like da music anymore den stop listing to it, to me u r a juggahoe, a fake, n dats it, a real juggalo will be be down wit da clowns no matter how bad da music is or how good it is. dats all i got to say, so fuck da fuck off u fake ass motha fucka n to da family Whoop Whoop Juggalos 4 motha fucking life MMCL”

photos via Kelly O at The Stranger http://lineout.thestranger.com/lineout/archives/2009/05/18/im-just-a-juggalo

Stylists Are Aliens

Wow, you went away quickly.

I've never met someone associated with this business of "styling" "stylista" etc. etc. who wasn't skeezy. They are a strange breed...sort of like sped-up more "fashiony" versions of real estate agents/gay men (even the women) who won't shut up about meeting Justin Timberlake and love shiny things as much as my cat. They seriously make you want to be crunchy so you don't have to care about anything but forcing your white girl hair into dreads and where to get your next pair of Keen shoes. Yes, the shows about this business might be entertaining, and really, what kind of literally forced from the bowels of hell show won't I watch on Bravo nowadays?

Why, when you are a stylist, do you have to be a fucking sycophant? Like it is NOT EVEN ALLOWED to not like a celebrity, or a designer, or be a little dirty sometimes. Even punk rocker stylists are gross. They dress their clients in studded miniskirts and "rock 'n' roll" tongue sticking out shredded leather bullshit DAVE NAVARRO I'M LOOKING AT YOU.

I guess I'm talking about taste levels here and maybe not the whole industry. I mean, someone dresses Gwyneth Paltrow, right? But she also has great taste herself. She is totally into fashion and knows what looks good on her...so why do celebrities need stylists? They need someone to get them the best looks from the runways that would look the best on them for events and such. But...designers send outfits to celebrities at the drop of a hat when they ask for them. It just seems like an industry built on nothing. It's like if people were obsessed with the guy who buys groceries every Saturday for Lil Wayne. Would that be interesting to people? Maybe. Just maybe. Calllll me BRAVO!!!

p.s. I hate when they talk about "pulling garments". It just bugs me.

Seattle Fashion Week

Too Extraordinary for Blayne: Having Taste

This is a pretty sad affair. Besides the biggest celebrity draw being Blayne "tannest person in Seattle" Walsh, there is a tangible lack of talent and interest. And forgive me for bringing this concept to mention, but WHERE IS THE CLASS? This is like the most trashy fashion event since...well, whatever the last event was in Los Angeles. The biggest draw is the "urbanwear" day with a party sponsored by Red Bull where I'm sure a bunch of girls in halter tops who would normally be at Belltown Billiards or Trinity are going to hump some guys with gelled tips. I can already smell the Axe bodyspray!

There is a day of this so-called "fashion week" that is dedicated to independent fashion. I'm sure the designers involved in this have worked very hard and love to make clothing. But I always feel that with things like this, because of the lack of independent design we have in Seattle, it's like "first come, first served". For example--if I was to put on a fashion show right now, from scratch, and I needed a quota of designers...there would be so few submissions, that I would have to include sub-par designs which I would normally cut out due to my personal taste and the aesthetic of the show. There is absolutely no opportunity for edit with fashion in Seattle. It's like, if you're not a crafty person making jewelry or scarves in Pike Place, then you're "urban". Or, you could be urban if you are lazy and don't finish your garments neatly (ahem, Blayne). Or, you could be "independent" if you take thrift store clothes and reconstruct them because you haven't gotten formal fashion design training. Which, I mean, there is really nothing wrong with that and a lot of designers start off this way, but A LOT of people in general do it and it doesn't mean you have any real talent.

I just wish I felt like our fashion week represented the REAL style of people of Seattle. The people who have organized the new week have definitely taken a different angle than the old week--it was mainly put on by retailers downtown (Nordstrom, etc.) and was very boring. This week for sure has more of a street edge, and is trying to bring in a young crowd. But does a Seattle fashion week have to either be A) boring, or B) INYOURFACE CUTTING EDGE ?? I would love to see someone organize a Seattle fashion event that truly captures the spirit of style in this city--innovative, tasteful, eclectic, and industrious.

This is still what Urban Outfitters looks like.

This is a comic I drew when I was in school for fashion design, in about 2005. I think it's hilarious (of course because I am my own biggest fan, in humor) because I was trying to make a joke about trends at the time that I thought were silly. Aaaand they are STILL GOIN STRONG. Especially those slouchy boots...I mean, yeah it's more mall girls that wear them now, but yeah. I hate them. The boy would still be highly attractive to me but ONLY if he was wearing a Phil Collins tee shirt. Yeah, I totally just drew a boy I wanted to date. And also, I actually really want a bag that looks like that....I used to have a thrifty one but the fake gold lame flaked off...

I should work on some updated ones!

Jenny Lewis, Neko Case, Every woman on Subpop records...

I'm getting a little tired of this look. BORING! That's it.




Ok, no wait I will clarify. This really has nothing to do with their music, or talent. I'm sure this album is fine, and I LOVE! the ukulele. And these women are all I'm sure very talented, strong, amzing, fine women of good caliber who are of good childbearing quality who would all look very nice next to a man who is also just as boring as any of the Fleet Foxes, or Devendra Banhart, or even that crazy kid from Omaha we used to like sometimes...what was his name again? But come on people! You can't love Anthropologie THAT MUCH! Style icons should not look like the girl who makes you want Apple products (Feist) or Zooey Deschanel or whoever is the new posterchild for Etsy.com.

Style icons should be either be so haggard they make you a little nauseous or so put together and perfectly rich looking they make you want to rip up Bill Cunningham's section of the Times.

An example:

Dress for Less!

Here's another hot tip, ya'll!

Dress in the hottest trend of the season, the boyfriend jean! Comfy, stylish...really the best of both worlds! I totally thought these were called "the lesbian jean", but I was wrong!!

And why pay those outrageous designer prices, when I found a hot deal for the exact same style?

So can you tell which of these is the more expensive, "designer" pair?

Pair #1 is from my fave slavery retailer, Walmart. They are LEI brand and retail for $20.00.

Pair #2 however, are equal parts bullshit to me, because they are from retailer "What Goes Around Comes Around" and are $198.00. But they are just vintage Levi's 501s. WTF--I could probably find these within a week at a vintage shop within 5 miles of my house for the same cost as the LEIs.

Ok, I'm not totally against "designer vintage" or whatever, I definitely think there is a market for vintage goods that are very hard to find, and are able to be priced up due to popularity. I just think the people who pay these huge amounts for said goods are sort of chumps is all. There are certain items (dresses, boots, jackets) that I would pay a chunk of change for. But torn up LEVI's? Pendleton's? Too easy to find for much cheaper.

Also, Walmart. There are some brightly colored skinny jeans there, long thin tees, even this hoodie that I could definitely see in a department store for...FIVE DOLLARS. That's less than a Spicy Chicken Meal (biggie sized). I just think it isn't registering to people that it is totally socially acceptable to pay these prices at places like Forever 21 and chatter about the designer knockoff styles but then make fun of the rednecks that shop for the same thing at Walmart. Both companies have blood on their (children's sweatshop workers) hands.

wa WAAAAA

Juniors
Misses
Petites
Womens
Ladies
Girls
Young Miss



Men's
Big and Tall

Ants In My Pants

I have become obsessed with Fashion Bug. You know, that store in the suburbs that has inexpensive juniors and plus size clothing? I don't know why, maybe it's because there was one in my hometown and when I was little I really wanted to shop there because I thought the name was funny (IT STILL IS!) but we never did. Which I'm very grateful about, now. My mom liked to buy me my JNCO's at a department store, thank you. J/K. Ok, I wore them one year.

So Fashion Bug is pretty unattractive for the most part. They have some plain tops and stuff but there are some interesting things...

1) What are "Scooters"?



They have a whole category of these...they look like denim skirts, they have shorts underneath... but aren't those called "Skorts?" Is Fashion Bug really trying to coin a new term for that clothing item? I don't like that. Who do you think you are, Fashion Bug?

2) "Right Fit" Bottoms



Sarcastic quotation marks are added here. I don't really like when any clothing manufacturer tries to put out a pair of pants that fit perfectly, or "right fit", as Fashion Bug has gone with. This is first of all, logistically impossible because of the bazillions of ways women's bodies are shaped, and also just kind of seems arrogant, no? I really don't think these "L.A. Blues" brand jeans would fit anything on me right.

3) This action:



This is one of those things that designers do for low-end labels where the layering is actually just attached pieces of fabric made to look like two layered tops. This is probably one of my least favorite things EVER because I think that people absolutely would not choose to wear it, I think it's purchased because it's there, and on clearance, and easy. It's LAZY DESIGN and also lazy dressing. Fashion should be natural, and this is...not.

One of the positive things about Fashion Bug and stores like it, I will say, is that they do offer alternatives for girls who are plus size. I think it's ridiculous that anyone over a size 10 would have to shop at places like these and obviously not have the same sort of style options (LIKE ROXY!) that others might, but whatever. Interesting how men's sizes at department stores regularly go to at least XXL and 38 waist, hmm?

Oh Noes..

I love you, Make Magazine. LOVE you. But please do not put people in top hats on the cover, even if they are in vintagey steampunk outfits that are nerdy and sciencey. I've seen punks and nerds both try to wear these in real life and they just end up looking CREEPY!

Gah, and the tinted round glasses and weird facial hair is just the icing on the "I live with my mom and jerk off to anime" cake.

This Says It All...

Maybe SOMEONE we know has been spending a little too much time with the likes of True Religion and Ed Hardy, hmmm?? We can all learn a lesson here.

Also, what is this?

Woah, L.A. Take it down just a smidge. Is this the look we're trying to achieve right now? It looks very dangerous, not like something I would be messing with. No sir, you can just keep your rabid snarling creatures, chainmail studded bikinis and olde English/metal fonts and hang with your other peeps. Like Xena, the Warrior Princess.

WoW this is so hot!

Yay! Here's another hot new trend...just in time for summertime! I wonder why it isn't being covered in the major fashion media?? It's like Anna Wintour is just pretending this doesn't exist or something??





For serious though, why don't people take nerds who LARP more seriously as far as clothing goes? I guess there are places like Hot Topic and Spencer's Gifts where they can buy those t-shirts that say things like, "I can't hear you over the voices in my head" or "Keep staring, I might do a trick"...hahaha...there are about a million of those shirts. They're HILARIOUS! Anyways, there are certain kinds of geeks (the non-lazy ones) who are actually pretty awesome and intense about things, like these LARPing (Live Action Role Play, hello!) costumes. They get their hair did, and have crazy makeup, and create these outfits so they can go romp in public parks with swords and say "LIGHTNING BOLT! 5 HIT POINTS!" I guess that's why it may not be that commercially viable...they like to handcraft these nutty garments.

I mean, I've noticed that even if a certain segment of nerd is not super into things like LARPing, they can still very much be into fashion. It's just a type of style that no one ever talks about, because it goes against basically everything that happens to the "hipper" segment of the population. But sometimes it crosses over! Like what about those guys who totally think they are superheros and wear badass industrial boots? And I've been seeing a LOT of gamer-types wearing very snazzy fedoras lately. I'm not very into the trenchcoat thing, though. It gives me the heeby jeebies.

VULGARITY!

These women with these ankles! How dare they flaunt their goods like so much trash in the streets! I dare say this will get much worse, if not something is done about it!

OH WAIT! Boys can do it too? Ok, then.

yummyhairymanleg...

Environmentally Hazardous Clothing

Alright. This has been going on for awhile now and for some reason I've been watching a lot of TMZ lately (I don't know why) so I'm aware I'm not breaking any news here. This is not a celebrity blog, and I completely understand if someone's reaction to what happened between Chris Brown and Rihanna is somewhat ambivalent (if only because said person doesn't really care about celebrity news or who Rihanna is or any "Umbrella-la-la-la"s). The thing is, I don't really think this is a run-of-the-mill celebrity scandal; so far it's brought up issues of sexism, race, relationship abuse, victimization, and parental abuse. A poll was done at a high school and found that 1 in 10 students thought that Rihanna had deserved the physical beating she received. TMZ has been asking celebrity's opinions and has been shocked by the amount who have no opinion or give condolensces to both parties, not just Rihanna. On discussion forums, users talk about how she had mouthed off, been cheating, had spread an STD, or otherwise had provoked the fight and abuse.

I've noticed a large age gap in the responses, older people, especially older women, seem to be more horrified and bring up terms like "abuse", or "beating". Younger men and women seem to be more concerned with why they got into an altercation, the physical attractiveness of both celebrities, and are more likely to make fun of the situation. Obviously, more attention needs to be payed to education and awareness of women's rights, healthy relationship interactions, and gender roles in our public schools.

And this is also where I disagree with the idea that there is just way too much "political correctness" in our society. Fuck that. Conservatives use this as a talking point and it's complete bullshit. There needs to be some serious social condemnation of behavior like this and of people who defend abuse of any kind. I would rather be a little too polite and say things like "Happy Holidays" than look at this sickening WOMEN'S tank top with bloody scrawl endorsing the broken up face of a starlet.

Offensive clothing happens in many forms...exhibit A would be the boycott in 2005 of Abercrombie and Fitch's lovely line of t-shirts endorsing teenage girls to use their tits to get ahead and taunting brunettes (wtf?). A group called the Women and Girls Foundation forced the company to pull certain tees and issue an apology.


UMMM....DATE RAPE ANYONE?


I LOVE WHEN CLOTHES GIVE ME AN EATING DISORDER

For examples of other types of clothing that give off subtle hints of this type of grossness see: Michael Stars, Juicy Couture, American Apparel.

So why can't clothing manufacturers be more ethical and think about issues that affect their customer like these ones? Women are by far the major consumer of most fashions, and all of these things are talked about openly now--abuse, health, gender equality, sexism, etc. Seventeen magazine, for example! They are constantly publishing letters to the editor that basically state the same thing: "thank you for writing such and such story about an issue, but why do your advertisements totally contradict your editorial sentiment?" These are issues that are just plain ignored by most fashion entities. It's definitely not a priority for most of the junior's brands out there, and the old way of doing things--and their wallets--get in the way of progress.

ECONOMIC CRISIS FASHION!!!

Walmart brand "Puritan" cardigan, $13.97


Hahaha wtf, it looks like American Apparel? Good thing we won't let this evil big box into the city, poor Dov Charney would be losing profits left and right! By the way, Walmart also has a "Norma Kamali" line now and Dickies for like 8 bucks. Geez.

On An Un-Fashion Related Note...

I LOVE CARLA! I hope she wins!!

Fashion Marketing 101

When I was in fashion marketing classes about six (!) years ago, no one really paid attention to low end fashion. Everyone was mainly concerned with opening boutiques that carried Sevens and Juicy...because most of the time people who go into fashion marketing (to be a buyer, or open up a store, or manage a chain, etc.) think of themselves as very trendy.

Being trendy did not include needing to know about low end retail stores. They mainly included Target, Walmart, Kmart, Old Navy, some mall stores...anyone remember DEB? Or Rave? Rave underwent a makeover to try to capitalize on the new popularity of stores like Forever 21, and is doing much better now. These were places that trendy people did not need to pay attention to, because they catered to shoppers too concerned with bargain to understand fashion.

No one ever thought of low end retail as being part of the trend cycle. In my opinion, not only are stores like Forever 21, H&M, and Topshop a part of the cycle, they are major catalysts in fashion in general now. Because of the cheap labor and quick turnaround process for their lines, they are able to pick up on designer trends much sooner than a midrange brand could. Also, they aren't afraid of losing a customer base who could be frightnened of those wacky high end designer trends. Abercrombie and Fitch, for example.

There are good and bad aspects of this new industry force, I would highly recommend the documentary on the subject "Made in L.A.". It follows three Latina immigrants who work for Forever 21 and the struggle for them to receive basic working rights. Many people have actually boycotted the chain.

http://madeinla.com/

Local Fashion

I'm always quick to defend Seattle, I absolutely think it's one of the best places on Earth. Granted, I haven't been to many other places on Earth, but I just have this really strong feeling about it, ok? And even though I love, LOVE, this place, my home, I just have a couple bones to pick with it. There are some things I just can't defend, and I could definitely make a list of them in short order to share with you.

1. Our sad, sad transit situation. For some reason we are 20 years behind ever other major metropolitan area at least and we're just now slowly starting to catch up.

2. What's up with the crappy pastries? I know people have said this before, but it's so true. I kind of like Top Pot Doughnuts (not as good as Voodoo though) and the French bakery in Wallingford is also great. But that's it?


La Boulangerie

3. Condos. Let's leave the city be, ok you scummy developers? Oh wait, you already can't sell anything because no one wants to buy a $500,000 one bedroom at Denny Triangle, and if they did make that mistake they've lost half the value in the last year. And you ruined all of Capitol Hill! Go away condo monsters! Give us affordable rentable properteez!

4. Passive-Aggressive-ness. Everyone knows we're like this weird kind of nice/not nice human and we like to quietly judge. Sometimes I'm ok with it (like I would rather not talk to people on the bus, so that's ok) but sometimes it bugs me (like ok if someone is trying to PISS on said bus then it's definitely ok to speak angry words).

like roommates, Seattle is

AND, 5....of course is our standing in the FASHION world. Let's discuss.

Alright. Pros and cons. Our outdoor industry is awesome. REI, Eddie Bauer, Filson...our region is known for our love of outdoor culture and the designers in charge have been slowly catching on the the prospect of using fashionable styles along with utilitarian designs. Also, Snowboard Connection! They carry great local lines of ski/snow/skatewear. And now that I think about it, I'd say that the skate/urbanwear industry is basically the most successful, locally grown, forward thinking network in Seattle right now.

Ok, but we're also known for super dowdy clothing. Khakis, anyone? I blame Microsoft/tech industry and I think we are lazier about dressing for adverse weather here. We got away with it when dressing like a lumberjack was popular for everyone in the 90s, but I think we can step it up now. The thing that confuses me that I think that we have some great street style in Seattle, and I don't really buy the thing that people say about us being years behind New York--except if you look at the number of businesses that contribute to our fashion identity. We just do not have the kind of local support for forward thinking design that we should.

Let's compare to Portland. It was perfectly portrayed in the last season of Project Runway--the girl from Portland was innovative, fresh, and had a kind of style you could really pinpoint. And the Seattleite?


Fashion in Seattle is like Blaine...confused and all over the place.

So we need to correct this. When The Stranger puts out it's annual Fashion Issue, instead of pimping items from Ian and Nordstrom, it should be displaying the latest lines from the well-known, supported, reputable local designers. When students major in apparel design, instead of moving to NY/LA/SF blah blah STAY HERE! Form collectives with other designers and open up spaces in cheap neighborhoods like the CD and Georgetown! And be friendly, no one likes snobs, only snobby design. But most of all, let's support the local businesses that are paving the way for good design in this city, and ignore the ones who aren't.



NOT HERE



HERE

Kidding aside, I definitely think we have the power to make Seattle more successful in this area because we have the kind of atmosphere that could foster the growth we need. We just need to sort of collectively find our sense of self, style-wise. Personally I think having an outdoors/industrial-type base is perfect, and if we combine that with organic and innovative design we would be right on the money. It would be like a Euro-unisex-future thing and we would be an unstoppable army of good taste and it would be the BEST.

http://www.impulseseattle.com/
http://blackbirdballard.com/

OH THE HUMANITY...of mom jeans.

I LOVE these Grey Ant pants. Everyone's making such a stink about how fat and disgusting Jessica Simpson is, (ummm ok Fox News who are you, the mean girl in middle school that made DJ Tanner eat her lunch in the phone booth?) that no one argued the merits of high waisted pants! Ok so you know how when they have discussion on the teevees about politics and such (pros and cons and all that) they have experts from one side, and then an expert from the opposite side? I think it's called journalism. I think it should be the same about fashion. Like just because some uptight boring girl on "What Not To Wear" thinks something is unflattering, does that make it TRUTH? I wish I could ban that word, flattering. They say it forty million times an episode of Project Runway, and it drives me crazy. I'm so sure everyone in America who was criticizing Jessica Simpson's beautiful denim wears completely flattering things all of the time...because last time I was at a mall I saw some things. So people! Stop obsessing over that part of your body you hate! You should display it to the world, with freedom, it shall save you!

Best and Worst and Whateverrr

So even though it's already February and everything, I thought since I just started this thingy I could do a little best and worst of 2008. I've been thinking of a LOT of trends lately that I would really rather not see anymore, but I've also been more excited about fashion in general. I sort of felt like we went through a dry spell there for a bit. I mean, girls thinking LC from the Hills is a fashion icon is a little telling, no? Boring is not a style.

So I began to peruse The Internets for some "best and worst" lists for last year, and of course, found myself disagreeing with almost everything I saw. First of all, they seem to be written by people outside of the fashion industry on more generic websites (AOL, about.com) which probably cater to readers of lots and lots of top ten, best and worst, lists, quizzes, etc. They all kind of say the same thing. Most worst trends of the year were critiques of high fashion trends that maybe wouldn't go over so well in Middle America, and best trends of the year are basics, styles we've seen for generations, very flattering things. Well DUH! I had a weird feeling that Tammy from Tampa, mother of three, wouldn't be so into jodphurs and gladiator sandals. Tammy is only allowed to wear flip flops or crocs, of course! But I don't think that making fun of high fashion trends is really that interesting...really, certain trends coming from designers are only around to be chattered about by fans, worn by three women in New York City, and then filtered through the fashion cycle and watered down versions are worn by all. I find it to be a little negative on the part of people in the fashion industry to constantly be going through these motions, like why are you assuming that Tammy from Tampa wouldn't wear some oxford booties with her skinny jeans?

I think a more interesting topic to think about is this: what trends or fads are truly the "worst" because they are unflattering, or offensive and you also feel like they are being shoved down your throat by retailers? And what trends are truly the "best" of the year because they got you excited by the prospect of creating something for yourself?

I came up with a couple of my own. For worst I nominate probably one of the worst things to enter my life since that time in high school when the only bands on the radio were Nickleback and P.O.D....


AFFLICTION!



Why do bodybuilders like this brand? Is it some sort of proof of masculinity to wear an overpriced t-shirt that looks like something a 7th grade boy would scrawl on his canvas zip-up binder? Is this what "metal" looks like now? Really? And why are they always weirdly religious, with the crosses and all that? And also, rhinestones? Do you really need more shit on that fabric?
Why doesn't anyone ever talk about this blight on the suburbs of America?


For best, or my favorite trend I started to get into at the end of last year:


SLOUCHY BAGGY JODPHUR-Y PANTS!



This is from Chloe Spring 2009. They're seriously not that hard to wear...I'm still kind of getting used to them, it's a little tricky. But isn't everyone a little tired of skinny/wide leg trousers? And they're definitely NOT the same as "boyfriend cut".... they have to be real tailored, fitted at the bottom, maybe rolled up, but very feminine I think. I'm also really into baggy blouses that are tucked in (not over leggings, geez). Anyways there are lots of things I'm pretty excited about for this year but I think I will wear pants like this basically all the time. So Easy Breezy!

If people actually read this blog this is where I'd ask the audience's opinion on their best and worst of 2008, so instead I'll just hum to myself and post this baby.